Coaches and none

Our team hasn’t had a coach for quite a while now. I miss having someone on the sidelines who can assess the game and sub us in and out. I even miss a coach who runs practices so we get better. In earlier times, we were neophyte soccer moms eager to play but with no clue about skills, positions, or even exactly what “offside” meant. So we hired a variety of young transplanted Brits ready to accept payment for the “football” they had played since they were two! The first one – I can’t remember his name – was blonde and indifferent, as in, he saw no point investing in a bunch of middle-aged women and preferred coaching players our daughters’ age. I don’t think he ever even knew our names. Then there was Patrick. He tried to give us some tips — and of those, all I remember are: 1) don’t chew gum or you may choke to death while playing (I still chew gum), 2) always keep your cleats clean and Vaselined (my cleats are a mess), and 3) if you carry the ball to the end, a defender might kick it out and give you a corner opportunity. Personally I think Patrick had a crush on one of our players. He also found younger teams to coach. Enter Paul, also a Brit, who had us, at the very first practice, attempting slide tackles! They don’t even allow slide tackles in the over 40s! Our last coach was, finally, a woman closer to our age. Lilia was a player, a ref, and was once on the Mexican Women’s team. In coaching us, both in practice and in games, she acknowledged our inexperience and our age, and treated each of us according to our individual strengths. She believed in us and pushed us to be the best we could be. And the standings showed it. We started to tie and even occasionally win games. I miss her. Ever since we moved to Orange County, we have coached ourselves. We no longer have weekly practices and must rely on our own sense of teamwork and fair play. A coach can be helpful and encouraging or tough and abusive. The same with one’s teammates. Having played with some who have disdain for those not as good as they are, I prefer a supportive attitude. I know it makes all the difference in my play. We all make “mistakes.” When I saw that professional men in the World Cup made the same ones, I realized it was “progress not perfection.” That’s what I love about soccer. I am always learning and getting better. And there is always another game!